July 18th, 2005

Eating Disorder

Why do I have so much trouble getting food into my mouth? I can't eat anything these days without getting it all down the front of me. I've taken to automatically spraying all my shirts with stain remover, 'cause even if I can't see it, I know there's some sort of food there. On Saturday I went to the hairdresser with food on my shirt AND pants. I've changed twice today and am wearing a food stain as I type. Is there a hole in my chin or something?

Back in the day, I used to wear a lot of black. People thought I was trying to be chic or something, but really I was just trying to hide some massive food stains. I am deeply embarrassed by my slobbery.

It's not like I eat like a pig, either. I read the unabridged Emily Post at a young age, I know how to sit up and use the correct fork. I just can't get it to my face without dumping it everywhere. And no, I don't walk around with my mouth open, either.

Maybe it has something to do with having large breasts, like I have a shelf that catches my food. Or maybe I'm dipping them in things without noticing. But that doesn't explain my pants!
  • Current Music
    Bernard Hermann - Twisted Nerve